Okay so 

I might just end up liveblogging my adventures of getting this essay done today.

So presently I have one and a half rough drafts done. The first one, that I turned in, is in second-person that I wrote on a whim at one in the morning that turned out better than the other pieces of shit work I wrote that night.

I am currently in the process of just opening a vein and making changes while trying not to go over the 4-page limit. And failing.

The second one I have is in first-person and, to be perfectly honest, isn’t turning out all that great for some reason. Maybe it’s because I fail hard at beginnings when it comes to writing.

Plans for that is to get a rough draft out and just sort of compare the two.

Let’s do thiiiiis.

So I just realized that, by taking out the double-spacing in “Aya Sutton, English 100”, my essay gets shortened by a heck of a lot- from five pages to four. More room to splash around in! But not all that much, considering the MLA format is 12 pt. font and double spaced. /wrists

Am I allowed to do that, though? … Can I just take out the English 100 part? I mean my professor knows what class she’s teaching, all she really needs to know is my name, right?

So I think I’m done with fixing up the second-person version.

But the first-person paper is just continuing to give me a bitch of a time. Suddenly all the distractions are twice as tempting due to my multiple failed attempts at writing this version.

Slowly succumbing to the temptations

It’s time for a break I think.

It should not be this difficult to write about my six-year-old self being bullied in first-person.

This is-

this

is

absolutely

ridiculous.

THIS IS STUPID—

I can’t do it. For some unknown reason, I can’t write this thing out in first-person. Maybe it was because I actually LIKED the one I did in second-person, and some deep, inner, subconscious part of me doesn’t want me to make the work put into that one in vain.

I am a failure of a writer. Its me.

You can do it Aya

Maybe I’ll just bullshit it. Like just completely bullshit it, no stopping to think. Because that apparently worked pretty fan-fucking-tastic with the second-person one. At one in the morning, no less.

I’m just

going to uh

take a quick break

from writing out the first-person one.

Because um. My roleplaying partner finally replied after like half a week break and I-

I-

I kinda need this.

My OC babies

they call for me.

I swear I’ll just take like an hour and a half and then I’ll get right back on track. I mean like some scientists or something say that you’re like more creative during the night, so I’m just waiting around for that hahahhahahahahaahaahhh

I think I’m going to just.. turn in the second-person one.

But I’ll be fully aware of the possibility that I MAY get points deducted for writing in that perspective. And I will not be disappointed. Because let’s face it, that graduation statistic thing really slapped my self esteem, so getting a MEH grade on this essay won’t even faze me, haha.

“Revise the piece carefully for word choice, specific language, and vivid adjectives. This piece should be typed and double spaced between 150-225 words when complete. Please put the word count at the bottom of your page.”

“This piece should be typed and double spaced between 150-225 words when complete.”

“double spaced between 150-225 words”

“150-225 words”